Hop In My Metaphorical Boat

I was on my dinner break at the Starbucks in Barnes and Nobles tonight when I overheard the following:

"I wanted to travel the world and write. It's all I wanted to do after graduation. I thought it'd be great. I'm young and I'd really be living, you know? And what did I pick for myself? Pain. Lots and lots of pain and suffering. I wanted to be inspired and liberated, not screamed at and covered in greasy shit all day."

Hearing this made me want to jump up and point while exclaiming :

"Haha! You see I'm not the only one!!" 

The above was said by a  twenty-something year old guy who couldn't stop twitching his left leg. (I think we'll name him Jason, he looked like a Jason, no wait- Max) 

Max was talking to a girl, who was probably the same age as him. He was nervous and kept on talking really fast for minutes at a time. And every time the girl laughed Max would nervously turn a page in the open book in front of him, but never actually look down at the words. He works in a restaurant as an owner's assistant or something. After they left I noticed that Max left the book which turned out to be "Bones" by Jennifer McLagan. (Hmm...)

I'm not the creepy girl who stares at people in public and scribbles on napkins while eavesdropping-- trying to get each word down. Well, tonight I was- for only like three minutes, only because come on, that was a great line and it had to be quoted. 

I, of course, was inspired afterwards and when I got back from my break I spent the last ninety minutes of my day on Monster, YahooJobs and Craigslist. Just give it time, folks. And positive thinking.

 All I need is a lot of positive thinking and a little bit of time. 

P.S. Someone in my writing class gave me a copy of the DVD The Secret, so that's been spinning in my head lately. That stuff really does work though!

One is The Loneliest Number

My job tends to be a little...how do I say this...unnervingly stagnant at times and I work the afternoon/evening shift so I often find myself solo on the floor. I've gotten pretty creative at my desk and have found ways to entertain myself when I am alone and need a break from the edge-of-your-seat data entry I do.

I share this with you because well really, the fact that I even do the following acts entertains me even more.

When no one else is in the office I usually listen to the Virgin UK Radio station online. It streams live from London and plays some pretty fantastic music. What I've been doing a lot lately is e-mailing the on-air DJ. Only a mere commercial break later I then hear a friendly, shout out from five hours ahead. It thrills me for about three minutes and then I get back to work. The little things people, remember the little things.

Occasionally in my job I have to venture from the 9th floor to the basement floor to gather some more information (a big word for data) that will eventually be entered into the computer. Since I do work during quieter hours, like I mentioned, I am often in the elevator by myself. When these daily occurances arise I am also wearing high heels. And to get my blood moving... I find myself tap dancing in the elevator. And then sometimes breaking out into a full dance routine while I am confined in the small metal box as it slides downstairs. You must remember I sit for about four hours at a time and get very antsy. So a dance break is really just a side effect of all that sitting and crazy, intense inputting I do.

I mean, it could be worse. I could sing. And if you know me- then you know, me singing would make any situation quite worse. Okay- now judge away.

But I promise, the next time you're in the elevator and got a couple floors to go, you may find yourself 'breaking it down' when no ones looking. You may think it's a one time thing, but believe me I was singing a similar tune once. Well not singing, obviously...but you know what I mean.

(Also, just to compare: the two most non-work related activities normal people do at work are searching for a new job and blogging.)

Comfort Food

         The next time you're in Murray Hill in the daylight and it's not from walking home just as Joshua Tree is closing, check out this great Jewish deli called Sarge's on 3rd and 37th. 

Colorful side note: Joshua Tree 

(or any Murray Hill bar on 3rd ave)  = 

the last resort bar in NYC if during a night out you haven't yet:

A- met any out-of-towners

B- met any iBankers in popped-collars

Also, if you go out in the City 

and don't meet the two above mentioned types then

 I'd really like to know where the heck are you going out 

and how are you getting your drinks paid for exactly?

 Moving on.... Sarge's is a small dive of a deli but the service is fast and friendly, even the Yenta-Miss Havisham waitress who was there when the deli opened in 1964. She somehow survived the 60's and now can balance a platter of potato pancakes, matzoh ball soup, and a cheeseburger without stumbling in her heels. 

They also deliver and are open twenty-four hours. Get the warm kugel for dessert or even as meal. On the menu it says it serves two, but I somehow bypassed that note because it was so good the entire dish served just my stomach alone in under five minutes. Now that's good service!

(If you're in the mood to satisfy your inner Jew then try Ben's Deli in midtown and Katz's in the Lower East Side.)

Result of a Craigslist job search at midnight

Reason #8,439 it's not good to be in the TV industry right now especially when you are looking for a new job within the industry.  

(Here's a hint: two words).       

H i r i n g    F r e e z e

Gives you a chill just thinking about it, huh? Thanks to the writers strike there's no new episodes of Ugly Betty and also no new decent jobs too. Sweet. 

Reason #743,939 to look for a job in a new industry: (see above).

How to Stop An Anxiety Attack For About Two Minutes

First off, acknowledge that you are having an anxiety attack. Is your head spinning? Are you having trouble breathing? Are you asking yourself a million questions without being able to stop to answer any of them? Do you feel like you are about to scream or throw something?

Any yes's? Well- good. This means you have accepted the fact that you are freaking out and can move on to fixing the problem. 

Here are a couple solutions depending on the subject matter:

• I feel deep angst and frustration towards the male gender.

• I'm ready to grab a gold fish, curse out my boss and quit my job.

• Everyone else is happy but me.

• I hate this over-indulgent American culture and need a break because I can't stand another celebrity face on the front page of a newspaper blocking out all information about the war.
  

Now, if none of those helped then go here:

• Looking at something pretty creates happy thoughts in brain.
  

Commute

I was on a regional train going from New York to Boston the night before Thanksgiving during my first year out of college, when an unsettling unhappiness set in: I wasn't in the holiday spirit yet. Me- the most joyous of holiday Jewish elves. I immediately decided to force the festivities upon myself by going to the Café Cart for some red wine. I entered the cart and instantly felt like I had just walked in on a party where all the cool kids hung out. Strangers were talking to each other in line, in the booths surrounding me, in front of the bathroom, all as if they were at a bar in Brooklyn on a Saturday night. Since the only thing on my mind was drinking I decided to stay quiet and eavesdrop, and I actually overhead three very distinct conversations in the ten minutes that I was waiting in line. By the end my head was spinning as I diagonally made my way back to my seat, with a half bottle of wine in hand.

The first conversation was between a collegiate male and a thirty-something year old woman.

I listened to their introductions and somehow they were surprised that they shared the same destination. Their conversation hovered over a shared topic about drugs and drinking. The male confessed that he was looking forward to seeing his friends because he will probably spend the next three days getting wasted and avoiding his family. The older female laughed and explained that her plans for the holiday consisted of doing cocaine, marijuana, and drinking while eating turkey on the cold beaches of Marblehead. The conversation sobered up fast when the woman admitted that in the last six months, five of her friends between the ages of 37 and 45 have died from the previous stated causes. The young male toasted his beer to her and said, “Here’s to not letting what you love, own you.”

Once I moved a couple feet up in line I listened to three women in their late thirties who were clearly all friendly enough to share a bottle of wine. I saw a handful of empty beer cans beside them and an additional empty wine bottle on the table. I had a feeling that their conversation would be entertaining. The short-haired brunette expressed to the curly-blonde that she would love to drop everything in her life and go live in Italy to live a completely different lifestyle. The third woman with the darkest hair got really excited because her friend’s sister did just that a few years ago and absolutely loves life. The three went around saying how marvelous it would be if they left their current jobs (which apparently allow them to live well but not like queens), and start over in some European country. They all promised each other that they would, in fact, complete their plan one day.

Walking in on the previous conversation was what really threw me. It’s like having a dream and then hearing about someone else have the same exact dream the following day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not that naïve to think that I was the only single-girl living in New York struggling with her career and prospects. Nor did I think I was the only one who fantasized about leaving everything for a more fulfilled. But it was great to hear my crazy insomniac thought process become conversed in front of me by three strange, drunken women on a train.

I suppose I’ll mention the third conversation because after I heard this chitchat I was ready for my wine and had luckily reached the counter.

This convo was between a twenty-year old sorority girl and twenty-two year old male computer programmer. Her looks put her way above him, but his maturity and tact put him light years ahead of her. I don’t lie when I say that he was reading a book titled “The Conservative Financer”. The two of them somehow began talking about partying in New York. The male explained that the female looks like she does enough partying for the both of them. The girl proudly told him that she had been getting into New York City clubs since she was fourteen. The two swapped their Thanksgiving plans. The girl highlighted that she was going to her cousin’s house in Boston for the holiday, which she had been doing since before she was born. This was the point where I slid a look at her eyes and realized she was blazed out of her mind. She then began to question the computer programmer about Plymouth Rock.

She asked him if it was really a rock, where it was, and if Pilgrims really had Thanksgiving there or not. He answered all her questions appropriately. It was when she announced that she wanted to have her Thanksgiving at Plymouth Rock while dressed as a Pilgrim, that I think both the computer programmer and myself realized that looks aren’t everything. - Belated Happy Holidays to all.

Truth #1

“There is a very real possibility of getting your heart

 brutally stepped on in New York City, 

where the dating scene 

more closely 

represents downtown Baghdad 

than a dinner and moonlight serenade.”

-said by wise guy pal J.W.

Advice

Everyone has an opinion on how you should live your life when you get out of college. Most of the times the other voice comes form your parents but sometime it could be a stranger. I find that the best people to receive advice are from people you don’t know, people who have nothing to do with your daily proceedings. Strangers, since they are the most uninvolved, unbiased people related to you, give the best advice no matter what the conundrum. 

Recently, I got some words of wisdom from Mark Harding AKA this guy:

 http://www.wherethehellismatt.com.

He has a wide Net following but let me sum it up: Matt is an average Joe who gets paid to travel around the world and occasionally blog but mainly he videotapes himself dancing. Here is the response I got from him when I asked him how I should direct my life:

“Choices are tough.

I think we don't really like having

too many options in life. When the realm of possibilities starts shrinking

and we get locked into a particular lifestyle, 

it's kind of a relief. 

But the truth is, you can live your life however you want.

Travel taught me a lot about myself 

and what I want to do with my time on the planet. 

I recommend getting out there as soon as possible. 

Don't worry too much about the money.”

Matt also mentioned that the field I am pursuing a career in is one of the worst out there and he knows no one happy in the industry. He told me to get out of it, immediately. 

There’s some advice you should take seriously, especially when you directly ask for it. But other advice it’s been to just take in and then let go. Some people even say that when you are making a touch decision you really aren't trying to figure anything out at all, most of the time you've already made a decision the second the obstacle was put in front of you- but you were just struggling to accept it fully. Think about that one...

Here's some advice though: If you listen and follow what everyone says you’ll be walking around in autopilot for most of your life. So try to figure some stuff out on your own, or just go read a lot of people's blogs.